Sunday, April 20, 2008

5 Things That Were Easier Than They Said...

5 Things That Were Easier Than They Said It Would Be:

1. Breastfeeding. I should've never gotten psyched out by everyone that told me that it would be a nightmare. Sure it hurt. I mean, I'd never had a baby suck on them before like there was no tomorrow. Of course it hurt. My nipples were sore. I think I remember blisters or skin peeling... I don't know. It really only lasted like two weeks. After that it began to become WONDERFUL. Of course it was wonderful before that, too. I remember nursing my little newborn and just CRYING because of the wonderful bond that we were sharing, the fact that she depended on me solely for nutrition and comfort. What a blessing these last 17 months of nursing and cuddling have been!

2. Having a newborn. She was like any other newborn. She cried at night and slept during the day, but she was SO EASY. It's the toddler that is difficult! If she could just sit still for one second! If I could tell her "No" and she would understand the first time! LOL! Having a toddler is an adventure every day. But I think I'm more tired now than when she was a newborn. When she was in the pre-crawling, pre-walking, pre-CLIMBING stage of life I could put her where ever I wanted! It was wonderful lol!

3. Labor. Labor was fine. I expected the pain. It was so painful. I'm not kidding. I didn't get an epidural (Argh to you, anesthesiologist!!!) and my daughter was posterior. That part was not the hard part. It was the stinking RECOVERY. I won't go into gory details... but let's just say I had an episiotomy and a at 6 days postpartum I got to go to the ER due to complications with that particular recovery. I'm not nervous about childbirth with baby #2, it's the recover. I'm praying that I don't get an episiotomy so I don't have to take pain killers postpartum!

4. Expenses. I know that babies are supposed to be expensive, but I can say that in the first 6 months of my daughter's life, the only thing I bought was diapers and wipes. And I admit I went to the nearby Walmart for inexpensive diapers! In the next 6 months I bought a few outfits and a few things of baby food and diapers and wipes. After that we moved and I started deal shopping for diapers and wipes. I found that with purchasing Luvs and with a coupon, I could get them pretty cheap. Even other brands, if I found coupons or deals (online is where I searched!) that I didn't have to pay much. Since I nursed my daughter, I didn't have to ever buy one bottle, one nipple, or even formula or other accessories. My LC gave me a hand pump after delivery so I used that. I think I pumped two sippies of milk for my daughter in her first year. She refused baby food, so I let her self feed from 7 months on and never bought baby food again. I got all of my daughter's clothing from gifts before she was born with the exception of a few outfits that I really didn't NEED to purchase. The carseat and crib (not that she slept in it!) were gifts, too. God provided everything. I didn't need to stress at all!

5. College. I didn't have a hard time at all after my daughter was born in college. I graduated with an AA when she was around 6 months old. I got mostly As that semester and the semester my daughter was born. However, I do admit that I gave up some things to graduate that May. I had been accepted into the teaching program at N.U. I was pretty excited, but once they told me that I should get a baby sitter and going to school and entering the program were like 2 full time jobs, I immediately imagined going to school in the morning then off to my internship and then coming home in the late hours... Anna already asleep. My breastmilk drying up. A bottle of formula in her mouth. A babysitter seeing her firsts. Her first roll. Her first crawl. Her first step. I cried. I couldn't bear to imagine it. I couldn't let that happen. I'm her mom. That means that I raise her. That means that I nourish her. That means that I see her firsts. That kind of lifestyle might be more than acceptable for other moms, but for me, that was some sort of suicide. The suicide of motherhood in a way. It was awful. I withdrew the very next day. There was no argument. I didn't even have to think hard on it for a while. I know it was the right decision every time I see my daughter do a new first. Every time she comes to me when she is upset. I'm not a stranger to her. I'm her mother! And it never felt more wonderful!
As my professor said when she and I spoke the day I withdrew, "College will always be here, but your daughter will grow up. You don't want to miss that!"

1 Comment:

Sarah said...

Very well written post! I love it! It is great to hear more about you.
I agree with all of it. I didn't go to college while being a mom, but I agree...you are the mom and you won't miss anything with staying home with Anna.
Breastfeeding was horrible (first time) with Nathaniel for about the first month or so. I had the cracks, bleeding, engorging...OWIE pain! But, the benefits/rewards...everything is truly wonderful! It didn't hurt at all with Caleb (and he was born when Nathaniel was 6)! Maddie was a breeze. She is nursing more now, so for that, I am thankful. She did the sign for juice tonight on her own! It was so stinkin' cute!