Friday, May 9, 2008

Feeling Frustrated!

A few of you remember this.... When I first started this blog... like my first or second post... I wrote about my brother Sean. He died in December. He killed himself. He left behind not only all of his sisters but also a wife who was pregnant. She is due in July. Why am I frustrated? She doesn't return emails, she doesn't answer calls, she doesn't return calls---she is basically trying to cut the entire Ta-- family out of her life! Normally I wouldn't mind, but with that baby being *possibly* my brother's...
Lately, I've seen on her myspace (I know, I hate myspace drama as much as the next. I never get involved in it until NOW...) I've seen friends asking her what she is naming the baby. She said she was going to name her Lily'ann Brooke (WHY the apostrophe!!!!???) I messaged her back the SAME DAY and asked her the baby's name and she never got back to me. Two weeks before that she told me she didn't know. This is almost a month later and still no letter.
I have been talking to Sean's best friend from high school and she told me that J. doesn't intend on giving the baby the last name of Ta--!
I am beginning to believe that the baby is not Sean's. I can't help but to theorize that Sean discovered the baby is not his.... on top of that J. was threatening an abortion and threatening to leave him... and ON TOP OF THAT she moved in with one of Sean's best friend's THREE months after his death. She's living with him now! My theory is that Sean couldn't stand this. It broke his heart. It tore him apart.
I know he left a suicide letter. I wish I could read it, but I'm afraid.
I also feel helpless. I don't want to confront J. because she might alienate me further. What if the baby really is Sean's? I don't want the baby to never know me.
But a part of me wishes that the baby is not Sean's. I don't want to know that my brother's only child is thousands of miles from me and I will never meet her.

2 Comments: said...

Oh, I didn't know about your brother. I'm so very sorry. There may be legal action that your family can take to find out if it is your brother's baby. You could and should be entitled to visits. I'm praying for you guys...

Sarah said...

oh that is so sad, and frustrating, Sarah! I couldn't imagine what you are feeling right now. I am so sorry that you have lost your brother on top of all this mess.

I will pray that you will be able to know the truth, and that God will work~